Mommy, I'm Illiterate.

Last night while snuggling with my kid, and reading to him from Corduroy, he looks up at me with his big brown eyes, and in a down trodden matter-of-fact voice says something that I would never expect a four year old to say. Especially not mine.

"Mommy, I'm Illiterate."

What? My mind is doing flips trying to figure out where this came from. Where have I failed? How did I go SO wrong?!? I imagined my beautiful son making a living mowing lawns at the age of 35 . . and I realized that it is one of the definitions I had told him the other night before bed. Thankfully, the horrid image disappeared from my mind, and i couldn't help but chuckle. He likes for me to tell him new words and tell him what they mean. So what if he's a dork - he's my dork. My vague definition of illiterate was something to the effect of "not being able to read," which left my child thinking of himself as an illiterate. I spent the remainder of story time explaining the difference in being illiterate and having not yet learned how to read. I'm still laughing over this. That will teach me to use vague descriptions. Next thing I know he'll be going to school claiming to be a homosexual. "I have lots of friends that are boys, mommy. You said it was boys who like boys, right?"

(Note : Not that being homosexual is a bad thing *Please don't hit me* Just, you know, four is a little young to be "coming out" and all)

After being beaten on the head multiple times yesterday by Kim, I believe that I have made a decision on how to spend the next year or so of my life. Instead of spending countless hours at home alone listening to a dumb audio CD and repeating words like "hepato, cysto, cyto, etc." in a monotonous voice until I pass out cold, I'm just going to dive in head first and apply for college courses again. If I'm going to do it I might as well do it right, and my local community college offers courses in Medical Information Technologies (Administration, Billing, Coding, or Transcription). Also, I will be able to first obtain my certificate, and then work my way up to a diploma or an Associates Degree in Applied Sciences. Now for the fun part : applying for Financial Aid. That is the part that makes me want to run screaming or hang myself with barbed wire, but I must prevail. By this morning I had pretty much settled for my crappy expensive at home course, but after reading Kim's frantic pleas for me to think about what I'm doing, for gods sake, I decided to look into other options. She didn't use those words, but I understood.

No, I promise not to turn my blog into a college blog. No I probably will never say "Today in class we learned about. . ." That is, unless it's something really cool. If I get accepted and everything goes as planned I promise not to bore you to tears with it. Pray, cross your fingers for me, do whatever it is that you do - just do it for me please.

Give-a-Way Update :: I'm still waiting to be e-mailed the photos taken of the loot. Two dang photos. It shouldn't be that hard, but there have been complications. Ah well, I shouldn't complain about someone just doing something to help me out. Bad mommy. I should get them today, and I will fill you all in on the juicy details!

Please excuse me while I pour myself a stiff one,