After having password protected this blog for a full 24 hours, I have lost half of my subscibers. I don't blame you for un-subscribing. I shouldn't have had to do that. I will fight to get you back though. I will type and type until my fingers bleed, or until you click subscribe again, whichever happens first.
I put a password on here for a dumb reason. I was afraid that someone I knew IRL (in real life) was going to read it. I was afraid of what they might read, Looking back, however, I realize that there is nothing that I have written that I should be ashamed of them reading. If I am going to have a blog on the world wide web, for Christ's sake, then I shouldn't write things that I am afraid of anyone reading.
Honestly, I don't write this blog for people that really know me to read. I never have. I write this blog for other's to read. I talk about some things here that I don't want everyone in my life to know about, and that's just how it is. Sometimes I'm inclined to write about not-so-good things. Sometimes I air out my dirty laundry. Only sometimes, but still. Even though people all over the internet can read this, it is still personal to me. I would appreciate it if you know me in real life that you don't read this blog. I would prefer it that way, but I cannot stop you. I have been doing this for awhile now. I've fought hard for the few loyal readers that I have here, and it's not worth ruining that over my being a coward.
There is just something scary about someone who really knows you reading your personal writing. It's quite a bit different than strangers or friends online reading it. I don't want to have to see you every day or every other day knowing that you've been reading my blog. I don't want to have to worry about what I write, knowing that you are probably reading. It will be hard writing about the things I'm used to writing about. That's all.
This is out of my hands. I hope that you can respect me enough to not come here, but if you cannot, then there is nothing I can do. It's not worth losing all of the readers I've worked so hard to get. Just, please please, if you do read here don't mention it over lunch. That would be a bit awkward.
I want to end this post with one simple promise for my readers. I will neverlock this blog again. I won't ever be the coward that I felt I was yesterday. I am curious, though. Do people you know IRL read your stuff? If so, does that significantly change the topics you write about?
I have a feeling that this post will be reworked throughout the day. I'm pretty sure I will come back with new thoughts, new words, and probably more apologies to the few faithful readers that I have. At the end of the day this may be a totally different post.
I quickly deleted the two posts I had made at my Atomic Sexxx blog, too, in order to protect what little bit of dignity that I had left. There will be more content up over there in the near future.