I drag my butt out of bed this morning at 7:30am. Well, not really, but that is when I wake up. "Honey.. HONEY.." I say with no response.
I lie there for a couple more minutes before the alarm goes off, a little bit pissed that I'm going to have to waddle downstairs and turn the heat on myself.
ERRRRRRRRR ERRRRRRRRRRRR ERRRRRRRRRRRRR ERRRRRRRRRRRR!!!
The teeth-grinding make-you-want-to-hold-your-breath (&die) sound of the alarm clock. The Man reaches over to turn it off, and I mumble "Will you go downstairs and turn the heat on so I can get in the shower?" He replies, a little annoyed, "THAT is why you were trying to wake me up?" AHA. "NO! I was just going to tell you that you could turn the alarm off, because I'm already awake." So he did wake up, but ignored me. Perfect.
Then, more snoring. Well, you know what - if he won't get up and turn the damn heat on then I'm not getting up at all. We just won't go. My pregnancy brain thinks like this a lot these days. I'm in "well if I don't get my way, then I'm going to piss YOU off" mode all of the time.
A minute or two later the snoring abruptly stops, he hops out of bed and runs to the bathroom. I figure he's just going in there to take a leak and right back out, but alas, he starts the shower for me AND goes downstairs to turn the heat on.
A sigh of relief escapes my lips because I'm all "I'm just going to lie here a few more minutes and let the shower warm up.." You know, not because I'm a lazy ass or anything.
The shower felt amazing. The only bad part is that I had lain in bed a little TOO long and ended up running out of hot water before I even got the conditioner out of my hair. BUT, I did shave my legs, so you are welcome Mr. OB/GYN. Okay, you weren't there today. You never are, but I did it all for you.
The moral of this story? It is totally okay to smack your SO with the closest object to you after attempting to wake him more than once with no response. Why? Because, he's faking it. He is totally awake and ignoring you.
P.S. More later. The fun didn't end there.